Once Joey and I launched IP Conceptions we began to receive various inquiries from all over the world. Before surrogacy in Thailand was discontinued, surrogacy programs in Mexico were investigated with more attention to detail. At that time we were one of only a few coordinators working with CEFAM, so people were curious and they sent inquiries. One of the early inquires we received was from an international surrogacy facilitator that works with IPs from Israel, Hungary, England and Spain. After multiple e-mail exchanges and Skype conferences, both sides decided that this was a business relationship worth pursuing. However, one of the options they were extremely interested in offering their clients was a guaranteed baby program. Prior to agreeing to work with IPC as their U.S. based surrogacy coordinator, CEFAM had been working with a surrogacy facilitator in Canada who had developed his version of a "guaranteed baby program". For a substantially higher total cost, his program provided IPs with a total of six (6) attempts (a combination of fresh or frozen transfers) and if after those six (6) attempts they did not achieve a complete pregnancy, they would be entitled to a refund of 50% of the Stage I fees paid for the program.
Our international facilitators were not happy with this program. And I completely understood why. Their clients wanted a baby; they didn't want 50% of their money refunded. They didn't want to be faced with six (6) failed cycles followed by an apology and a refund. They wanted a baby. Plain and simple. And that's exactly what we wanted to give them!
We went to CEFAM, who had always been extremely receptive to our requests and proposals in favor of assisting IPs, and we told them what we needed in order to assist these international IPs. We provided them with a price point and we asked them to do the analysis, asses the risk and let us know if an actual "guaranteed baby program" was something they could and would feel comfortable offering to these IPs.
I am extremely proud to say (as I am typically very proud of the way CEFAM responds to the needs of our IPs) that CEFAM came back with a resounding "YES WE CAN!" They gave us a price, an outline of the services and a proposed payment schedule. We had the green light to offer the very first truly "guaranteed baby program" which we proudly labeled the "Secure Baby Program". Our international facilitators were thrilled with the details of this program and by having the ability to offer this unique, first of its kind program to address the needs of their clients we were certainly able to reinforce our strong commitment to creating custom, personalized surrogacy journeys that closely match our IPs vision.
Please let there be no misunderstanding. If you choose to move forward within our "Secure Baby Program", you will pay a higher program cost but you will ultimately go home with a baby. If that happens on the very first cycle with eggs from your first egg donor and the assistance of your first surrogate, then you absorbed the financial risk and you return home with a baby - the cost of the program stays the same; there is no increase and there is no decrease. If that happens on the tenth cycle with eggs from your third egg donor and the assistance of your fourth surrogate, then CEFAM absorbed the financial risk and you return home with a baby - the cost of the program stays the same; there is no increase and there is no decrease. No matter how long it takes, if you have the stamina and emotional endurance to continue moving forward, we do too. We will not rest until you are safely sitting on the plane departing Mexico in route home.
As a coordinator, being able to offer a "Secure Baby Program" is a dream come true. Although it's never pleasant to inform IPs that a cycle wasn't successful, knowing we have the ability to keep going until it is; knowing we're not stopping until we achieve success; knowing we are going to realize the dream of becoming parents no matter how long it takes somehow makes the few unsuccessful cycles a bit more manageable.
Now that international surrogacy in Mexico has become the hottest new thing and CEFAM is the most desired clinic in the entire country, there will probably be many surrogacy agencies offering our "Secure Baby Program" to IPs everywhere. That's okay with us. We knew it would happen and since our ultimate concern is satisfying the needs and desires of the IPs, we are happy to know they will have access to this program from multiple sources. Just be sure to read the fine print and confirm your understanding of the details involved in the program you are being offered. We are always available to answer questions and/or to provide further detail regarding the "Secure Baby Program" as it was originally created.
We wish you the best of luck on your international surrogacy journey in Mexico and we hope your journey is a success!
Eternally hopeful, Forever faithful, Always grateful...
Catherine
IPC
Tuesday, October 7, 2014
Friday, September 5, 2014
Minds have been changed...
When we first began our program in March 2013, surrogacy
was fairly new and many in the international surrogacy community expressed concerns.
“Surrogacy in Mexico is too new; surrogacy in Mexico is scary; surrogacy in Mexico
is unsettled”. I can't count the number of times I heard "I just don’t
feel comfortable recommending surrogacy in Mexico". I would smile in
response and say "give me some time, I'll change your mind about surrogacy
in Mexico.”
Well, judging by the number of new surrogacy agencies
moving into Mexico in the recent days, I’d say I’ve accomplished my goal. It appears as though minds have been
changed. It appears as though surrogacy
in Mexico has gotten older, safer and more settled. Now, it seems there are many people that feel
comfortable recommending surrogacy in Mexico.
Minds have been changed about surrogacy in Mexico.
It’s true that surrogacy in Mexico has gotten older –
simply happened with the passage of time.
Surrogacy in Mexico was brought into the spotlight in the beginning of
2013. And the nature of the process is
such that time equals experience and success, in part. It’s been approximately 18 months since the
clock started ticking so yes…surrogacy in Mexico has gotten older.
I suppose it could be said that surrogacy in Mexico has
gotten safer in some ways. It’s safer in
a personal respect – the U.S. state department has removed the travel advisory
previously placed on Mexico City at the beginning of the year. Presently, there are no travel advisories in
place for either Mexico City or Villahermosa and statistically there is more
crime in Chicago than there is in Mexico City.
And since those are the two locations in Mexico where intended parents
will have to spend their time, I suppose you could say yes…surrogacy in Mexico
has gotten safer.
Whether surrogacy in Mexico has gotten more settled, I
suppose depends largely on the basis for the claim it was “unsettled”. If I had to guess, the exit process would be
my number one answer as the reason for claiming it unsettled. When I first encountered this objection in
March 2013, I don’t know if there were many (of if there were any at all)
intended parents from the U.S. that had babies via surrogacy in Mexico and had
already brought them home, having successfully navigated the exit process. We had created a process on paper and we had
the utmost confidence that our process was solid but the fact remained that our
process had not been tested and/or verified by either practical application or
by comparison. And our colleagues were
all in similar situations with an unverified, untested exit processes. Since that time, babies have been born to
U.S. IPs and they have successfully navigated the exit process, returning home
with their babies born via surrogacy in Mexico within our estimated
timeframe. These IPs are not from our
program, but we have had personal interaction with them and we have been able
to verify that our process, the process we presently have on paper is, indeed, comprehensive
and complete and we can use to assist our intended parents in successfully navigating
the exit process and returning home with their baby. If the exit process was the source of
concern, then yes…surrogacy in Mexico has gotten more settled.
Do these three areas of improvement truly explain why
minds have been changed about surrogacy in Mexico? Or have minds been changed about surrogacy in
Mexico for reasons that have nothing to do with these areas of
improvement? Do people now feel
comfortable recommending surrogacy in Mexico based on a true belief it’s a
mature, safe, settled option? Or do they
now feel comfortable recommending surrogacy in Mexico based on necessity? Regardless of how these questions are
answered, whether for good or for bad, one thing is not in dispute…minds have
definitely been changed about surrogacy in Mexico!
Monday, March 31, 2014
Surrogacy Success!
I think there is a misconception about surrogacy success. It is my personal opinion that surrogacy success does not necessarily mean that the Intended Parents (IPs) ended their journey with a baby.
I am fully aware that this is the goal; that this is the overall objective. However, there is absolutely no possible way to guarantee this outcome each and every time.
That means we need to define "success" in the context of a surrogacy journey. "Success" is defined by Dictionary.com as "the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one's goals". That definition would lead me back to saying a "successful" journey is one where the IPs go home with a baby. So, I guess we need to re-define "success".
A surrogacy journey has multiple diverse moving parts. And the job of a surrogacy coordinator is to make sure that these multiple diverse moving parts function in harmony. As surrogacy coordinators, we are responsible for making sure that the parts of the process fit together well. As surrogacy coordinators, we are responsible for making sure that we utilize the best parts available. It is our responsibility to make sure that the parts are reliable, state-of-the-art, relevant and optimal.
When Joey and I began the process of creating IPC, we came to a fork in the road. We were in a situation where the surrogacy facilitator that we had been involved with personally and professionally (PlanteHospital.com, LLC) was doing things in an extremely unprofessional, unethical and illegal manner. But we had a pregnant surrogate. So our choice was to blow the whistle and warn all of the other PH IPs so that they could take action that was appropriate to protect themselves at the risk of our own surrogacy journey or keep quiet and protect our surrogacy arrangement at the enormous expense of the hopes and dreams of the other IPs.
We made the choice to "blow the whistle" and although that was really stressful, I have never been sorry!
And we have learned that "surrogacy success" does not mean a "take home baby".
Here is the most extreme example that I know of (and these IPs have graciously given me permission to share their story)...
So they went to India and used the facilitator mentioned above. They ended up with a pregnant surrogate who delivered a healthy baby girl. They paid all of their fees on time and participated in the process all along the way to the best of their ability. But when they arrived in India for baby pick up, they discovered the surrogacy contracts were not in order (as they had paid for and been told). So as they stood in the hospital hallway on one side of the door listening to their little girl cry and scream, they were unable to comfort or assist her because their facilitator had not fully performed their duty. They did not have the appropriate paperwork. They were not allowed to care for their little girl. They ended up paying twice (and actually, maybe even three times - I'm not sure) for the appropriate surrogacy contracts to be created and approved before they were allowed access to their little girl. So you see...just the fact that they were blessed with a precious baby girl doesn't mean that their surrogacy journey was a "success".
At IPC we are going to define surrogacy success as this: Complete and honest communication at every stage of the process. Prompt and timely response to each and every request for information/service. And utilization of the most state-of-the-art technology in order to ensure that each IP knows that they had the 'best shot'. We define success as knowing that each of our clients were given the most perfect opportunity possible to conceive a child and begin their family.
And at that point, when we hand it over to God or Mother Nature, we then accept the role of messenger...delivering the news of the final result, knowing we did everything in our ability to optimize the outcome...
I am fully aware that this is the goal; that this is the overall objective. However, there is absolutely no possible way to guarantee this outcome each and every time.
That means we need to define "success" in the context of a surrogacy journey. "Success" is defined by Dictionary.com as "the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one's goals". That definition would lead me back to saying a "successful" journey is one where the IPs go home with a baby. So, I guess we need to re-define "success".
A surrogacy journey has multiple diverse moving parts. And the job of a surrogacy coordinator is to make sure that these multiple diverse moving parts function in harmony. As surrogacy coordinators, we are responsible for making sure that the parts of the process fit together well. As surrogacy coordinators, we are responsible for making sure that we utilize the best parts available. It is our responsibility to make sure that the parts are reliable, state-of-the-art, relevant and optimal.
When Joey and I began the process of creating IPC, we came to a fork in the road. We were in a situation where the surrogacy facilitator that we had been involved with personally and professionally (PlanteHospital.com, LLC) was doing things in an extremely unprofessional, unethical and illegal manner. But we had a pregnant surrogate. So our choice was to blow the whistle and warn all of the other PH IPs so that they could take action that was appropriate to protect themselves at the risk of our own surrogacy journey or keep quiet and protect our surrogacy arrangement at the enormous expense of the hopes and dreams of the other IPs.
We made the choice to "blow the whistle" and although that was really stressful, I have never been sorry!
And we have learned that "surrogacy success" does not mean a "take home baby".
Here is the most extreme example that I know of (and these IPs have graciously given me permission to share their story)...
So they went to India and used the facilitator mentioned above. They ended up with a pregnant surrogate who delivered a healthy baby girl. They paid all of their fees on time and participated in the process all along the way to the best of their ability. But when they arrived in India for baby pick up, they discovered the surrogacy contracts were not in order (as they had paid for and been told). So as they stood in the hospital hallway on one side of the door listening to their little girl cry and scream, they were unable to comfort or assist her because their facilitator had not fully performed their duty. They did not have the appropriate paperwork. They were not allowed to care for their little girl. They ended up paying twice (and actually, maybe even three times - I'm not sure) for the appropriate surrogacy contracts to be created and approved before they were allowed access to their little girl. So you see...just the fact that they were blessed with a precious baby girl doesn't mean that their surrogacy journey was a "success".
At IPC we are going to define surrogacy success as this: Complete and honest communication at every stage of the process. Prompt and timely response to each and every request for information/service. And utilization of the most state-of-the-art technology in order to ensure that each IP knows that they had the 'best shot'. We define success as knowing that each of our clients were given the most perfect opportunity possible to conceive a child and begin their family.
And at that point, when we hand it over to God or Mother Nature, we then accept the role of messenger...delivering the news of the final result, knowing we did everything in our ability to optimize the outcome...
Saturday, March 8, 2014
A little about Me and Surrogacy
Welcome to the blog for our new business venture IP Conceptions LLC. It is my hope and intention to share everything "surrogacy" through this outlet. I'm not an experienced blogger. I have a personal blog and I've only published a handful of posts so this will definitely be a learning experience. I'll try to post often. I'll try to post interesting surrogacy information. Once I figure out how to attach pictures, I'll share those with you too. I'll tell you about our visits to Mexico and our trips to meet our clients. I'll talk about our process and share updates and changes. I'll chat about our community and the latest news. I'll do my best to make this an entertaining and interesting space. But I think what I will probably end up doing most of the time is share me. I'll tell you what I'm thinking and what I'm feeling and what I'm doing as I operate and grow our surrogacy service.
Surrogacy is personal. It's probably one of the most personal journeys one could ever decide to take. And by the time most of us made the decision to take this personal journey, we did so because surrogacy because was just about the only thing left.
We came to surrogacy after encountering a lot of failure. We chose surrogacy after years of disappointment. We elected to proceed with surrogacy after exploring every other option. We chose surrogacy because it was choose surrogacy or choose nothing. We all came to surrogacy for different reasons and we all came to surrogacy for many of the same reasons. When we finally made the decision to use surrogacy as the means to create our family, we did so because we believed this was an option where our most heartfelt and sacred hopes and dreams would be respected and protected.
Surrogacy is a journey. It takes time and patience. There are times that you are in control of how quickly things move forward but there are other times when the speed of the journey is out of your hands. It takes planning and organization. This is a time sensitive, liner process. Planning is important; steps need to be taken in order and the components should be compatible with each other. Organization is key. Just as on any journey, you should know where you are at any given moment and where you are headed as you travel forward. This is a journey that has the potential to impact the rest of your life; one that you will remember forever. It should be a journey that you enjoy. And I believe the key to enjoying the journey is expectation, realistic expectation. When you know what to expect, you are positive, relaxed and can allow yourself to be hopeful. One way to develop a set of realistic expectations is through education. Talk to other IPs. Read. Ask questions. Research. Visit. Ask more questions. Take notes. Attend conferences. Join groups. Take whatever action necessary to obtain the information that is important to you. And after you have done all of that, ask some more questions.
Surrogacy is a community. My husband and I not only own and operate this business but we are also IPs using international surrogacy in Mexico to start our own family. Unfortunately, our introduction to the world of international surrogacy was an unmitigated disaster, so catastrophic that we could have easily packed up our hopes and dreams and closed the door on haveing a family of our own forever. Instead of doing that, we set up shop right in the center of the surrogacy world with our hopes and dreams on display for all to see. The reason we were able to turn that horrible experience into something wonderful; the reason we aren't afraid to keep dreaming; the reason we are still filled with hope - the surrogacy community. I have met the most incredible people while doing surrogacy. This community is friendly. This community is supportive. This community is generous. This community is compassionate. This community is filled with people that share experiences; they know how you feel; they get it. The people in this community believed in me and in my dreams when I didn't even believe in myself. The people in this community have loved me, have cried with me, have educated me. The people in this community have encouraged me, they have trusted me; they have been honest with me. This community is filled with people that truly want you to realize your dreams; it's filled with people eager to help you do that; people that have gone before you - this community is filled with hope. The surrogacy community is definitely the best part of this journey. I am honored to be a member and I am grateful that I have the opportunity to contribute something that will benefit this community. I am blessed to be able to give back.
Surrogacy is personal. It's probably one of the most personal journeys one could ever decide to take. And by the time most of us made the decision to take this personal journey, we did so because surrogacy because was just about the only thing left.
We came to surrogacy after encountering a lot of failure. We chose surrogacy after years of disappointment. We elected to proceed with surrogacy after exploring every other option. We chose surrogacy because it was choose surrogacy or choose nothing. We all came to surrogacy for different reasons and we all came to surrogacy for many of the same reasons. When we finally made the decision to use surrogacy as the means to create our family, we did so because we believed this was an option where our most heartfelt and sacred hopes and dreams would be respected and protected.
Surrogacy is a journey. It takes time and patience. There are times that you are in control of how quickly things move forward but there are other times when the speed of the journey is out of your hands. It takes planning and organization. This is a time sensitive, liner process. Planning is important; steps need to be taken in order and the components should be compatible with each other. Organization is key. Just as on any journey, you should know where you are at any given moment and where you are headed as you travel forward. This is a journey that has the potential to impact the rest of your life; one that you will remember forever. It should be a journey that you enjoy. And I believe the key to enjoying the journey is expectation, realistic expectation. When you know what to expect, you are positive, relaxed and can allow yourself to be hopeful. One way to develop a set of realistic expectations is through education. Talk to other IPs. Read. Ask questions. Research. Visit. Ask more questions. Take notes. Attend conferences. Join groups. Take whatever action necessary to obtain the information that is important to you. And after you have done all of that, ask some more questions.
Surrogacy is a community. My husband and I not only own and operate this business but we are also IPs using international surrogacy in Mexico to start our own family. Unfortunately, our introduction to the world of international surrogacy was an unmitigated disaster, so catastrophic that we could have easily packed up our hopes and dreams and closed the door on haveing a family of our own forever. Instead of doing that, we set up shop right in the center of the surrogacy world with our hopes and dreams on display for all to see. The reason we were able to turn that horrible experience into something wonderful; the reason we aren't afraid to keep dreaming; the reason we are still filled with hope - the surrogacy community. I have met the most incredible people while doing surrogacy. This community is friendly. This community is supportive. This community is generous. This community is compassionate. This community is filled with people that share experiences; they know how you feel; they get it. The people in this community believed in me and in my dreams when I didn't even believe in myself. The people in this community have loved me, have cried with me, have educated me. The people in this community have encouraged me, they have trusted me; they have been honest with me. This community is filled with people that truly want you to realize your dreams; it's filled with people eager to help you do that; people that have gone before you - this community is filled with hope. The surrogacy community is definitely the best part of this journey. I am honored to be a member and I am grateful that I have the opportunity to contribute something that will benefit this community. I am blessed to be able to give back.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)